Part 3- Love and Compassion- The Difficult Conversation

Can we transform the difficult conversation into a conversation grounded in Love and Compassion?  The journey of shifting culture to one of compassion and love is just that, A Journey.  This transformation is very possible however, it requires some shift in our approach, especially when it comes to the more challenging conversations.

We know through research that giving someone feedback is flawed and not based in accurate science. In fact, giving feedback often does little or nothing at all to improve a persons behaviour or work performance.  So why do we do it?   For a long time we have taught managers that feedback is critical. Give feedback immediately, often and be prepared to address things right away. However, the science would not support this approach.  Highlighting errors and flaws is not equal to increasing performance. If the carrot and stick strategy doesn’t  work and cultures grounded in fear don’t work then why not consider a culture grounded in Love and Compassion. It is time to look at each and every practice we have in the corporate context and identify if it humanizes or dehumanizes the community.

So what should we do?

When we create a culture grounded in love and compassion the Difficult Conversation becomes so much easier and in fact is not difficult at all. Getting there takes time and a real adjustment in our approach.   Allowing the heart to lead the way makes everything easier.  If we can apply positive regard toward another person even in the most challenging of circumstances we can begin to create a safe space for these conversations. When we are curious and willing to explore with an open heart and an open mind everything becomes easier.

When seeking any transformation or change in another person’s behaviour we must provide a culture of safety first and foremost. Trust begins to build and we begin to humanize the workplace where authentic dialogue, even when difficult, can emerge with great success.

Once this series on Love and Compassion has been fully explored we will share the next series which outlines the tools and techniques that create this culture and allows for sustainable transformation to occur.