In the second video in our Accountability Model series, we discuss the first tool and technique; Becoming the Observer. As leaders our ability to observe our thoughts…feelings, emotions and behaviours is a critical component of building self awareness and understanding our impact on those around us. Is what I am putting my attention on serving me, making me feel good, and getting the results I want. If the answer is “no” then slowing down and reflecting is important. We can then use mental contrasting to assist us in better understanding our emotions and behaviours. Mental contrasting is an activity where we use great questions of ourselves in order to consider a different perspective.
For example, we might ask:
- Do I have all of the information
- Why did I get triggered
- Do I know for sure it is true
- Could I apply positive regard
- What judgments do I have
- Are my judgements impacting me negatively
These are only some of the questions we use as we observe ourselves, thoughts, feelings and actions.
Everything begins with YOU. So start looking inward. If you want to change something in our outer world you need to change something on your inner world first.